This is not my typical message, but I feel a pressing need for more hands on deck. Earlier today, I had a dream that burdened my heart with heaviness. I wept, and even after praying about it and finding some joy, I believe this message is not just for me to carry alone.

I cannot share all the details, but in the dream, a little girl very close to my heart had been sexually abused by two young boys. It was a terrible scene. As I prayed for the interpretation, I discerned these words: “The child needs her parents.” I immediately broke down, because this child can’t be with both parents, and lots of kids are close to me since I teach kids at the Sunday school. It’s not enough for us to simply pray; we need to work on ourselves as stewards of the children in our care—whether as direct parents or indirectly as guardians.

Most children who endure such abuse are those neglected by their guardians, whether biological parents or otherwise. Parents living together or apart can both be unaware of the harm that can occur. The enemy uses broken people to inflict damage on these little ones, sometimes even under their parents’ roofs. Many parents are often preoccupied with other life matters, leaving their children alone for long periods. Some provide all the material needs a child could want, but that is not the love the child truly needs.

We have always heard stories and watched movies with these narratives, but they are real and they destroy lives. Coming from a dysfunctional background and knowing what you have been through, why would anyone want to bring a child into such a mess? What am I talking about? Nobody marries their enemy, yet something always goes wrong. Couples are divorcing more frequently than ever, and ironically, during their good times, they seemed so happy—only for things to fall apart once a child arrives. What is the problem? These are complicated and delicate matters, but they must be addressed. In the 21st century, with rights being a major focus, children into messy situations. The enemy’s target is to catch them young; the husband and wife are usually not the primary targets—it’s the children. Once a child is broken from a young age, it takes a miracle to redeem that person’s normalcy. Families are essential for a healthy society, and we don’t want to live in a world of hurt people. Hurt people hurt people. Our setting lacks an organized system to support character modeling, but we do have the body of Christ. It is far better to pray for growth, knowledge, wisdom, and other important matters than to pray for what has already been broken to be fixed.

My primary concern is that when getting married, you should first learn all you need to know about yourself—your emotional and mental capacity, among other areas. I believe that I am still discovering more about myself every day, as each year passes. Entering into a relationship requires a lot of commitment, so it’s not just about you. Age is not the ultimate factor for marriage, be ready, learn about marriage and child upbringing like your life depends on it – infect see it as a ticket to heaven. It is that important Secondly, during the first year of marriage, take time to know each other truly. Work through your differences and align your goals before considering having children. If a child does come into the picture, your choices should not affect that child; they need both parents. Ultimately, if a couple approaches marriage with the right motives, seeking to build a life together, God will bless that union. For the children left in the streets or neglected for one reason or another, the Lord Himself will envelop them with fatherly and motherly love.